Best Kept Secret (Santa)
by SineTimore
Summary: Secret Santa comes to the 12th Precinct and Beckett wants to know who picked Castle for a special reason.


**Disclaimer: **I borrow with gratitude, admiration, and love.

**AN:** Happy Holidays to all.

* * *

_**Best Kept Secret (Santa)**_

When it was finally Kate's turn to draw a name from the basket, there weren't many folded up pieces of paper that remained. She could tell by the subtle expressions of those that'd selected before her exactly who was relieved and who was dreading (as much as she) the infernal Christmas tradition that had now invaded the 12th, thanks to her all-too-merry fiancé. Kate had begged Castle not to even bring up the idea to Gates. It wouldn't end well, she had insisted. Sure, Gates had been supportive of their personal relationship up until that point, but Kate still felt that with one wrong move, the whole thing could collapse like a house of cards. Gates was way too hard to read, and a round of precinct Secret Santa seemed destined for disaster.

Unfortunately for Kate, she was wrong. She'd somehow forgotten all about Gates' holiday office decorations from last year and how much time she'd spent straightening the gold star atop her mini-plastic tree over those few weeks. Victoria "Iron" Gates actually liked Christmas. Most people did, in fact. Kate was still on a road back to that place, a road she preferred not include buying a $20.00 gift for someone she barely knew outside of work. When Castle walked out of Gates' office with a smile from ear to ear, she wasn't proud of it, but she actually felt herself pout.

Kate held the scrap of paper in her hand until everyone else was done with their selection. She worked with detectives, didn't want them to read her face as she'd done theirs. No, she shuffled back to her desk alone, leaving groups of others to make small talk about the "fun" to come and to tease each other about who'd picked whom. She glanced up as she took her seat and saw Castle bounding her direction. She set her pick aside, visible yet still unopened, and turned her attention to their current case file. And she waited for it…and it came.

"So, who'd you pick?" His body landed in his chair with such enthusiastic force that he nearly tipped over backward. And he barely seemed to notice.

"I believe the secret to _Secret_ Santa, Castle, is that I don't share that information with you. Besides, I haven't looked yet."

He didn't understand, of course. How had she not looked? That was the most fun part of the game! He spotted the discarded paper on her desk and reached his hand out for it without a hint of stealth.

"Excuse me," she began, without diverting her eyes from her paperwork, "what does that say?" She tapped her pen against the name plate next to her.

He looked down and replied, "um, Detective Beckett?" It came out as more of a question than an answer. He wasn't catching her obvious implication.

"Right. So, how about you keep your hands off of Detective Beckett's desk where they don't belong?" She grabbed what he was so desperate to see and pocketed it for later.

"Well, I suppose as long as that's not a euphemism, I'm fine with that rule," he teased, as he stood and straightened his jacket. "I need to leave anyway. I've got some best-Secret-Santa-ever shopping to do. I'll see you at the loft later, okay?" He didn't even have the patience to wait for her reply, and he was gone.

* * *

"Javi," she whispered across the desks between them, the bullpen early-evening quiet. "Pssst, Javi," she tried again, finally succeeding in capturing his attention. She signaled for him to come over and he obliged, confused and showing it.

"Why the hell are you whispering?" he asked with a peek around the place. "We're like the only ones here."

"Who did you get for Secret Santa?" Her tone was still muted, even in the absence of others. And she couldn't believe she was asking. She'd reprimanded Castle just hours before for the very same thing.

"No way I'm telling you who I got." He sounded offended at the mere inquiry. But, he really wasn't. Truth was, he didn't care much, but he was enjoying the fact that she seemed to. "You'll find out soon eee-nough." He turned to walk away but spun back around after a few steps. "Okay, but you tell me yours first," he muttered, reversing his previously stated position almost immediately.

"Good to know how quickly you cave, Espo." She shook her head in disapproval. "Just tell me, did you happen to pick Castle?"

"Nah, and I don't envy the person that did. That freakin' guy has everything."

"Helpful, thanks. Get outta here." She shooed him away.

She looked again at Stegner's name- written in holiday red and green- on the slip of crinkled paper before tossing it into the trash can. She'd have to find out who picked Castle tomorrow.

* * *

Kate woke early. She hadn't been sleeping much over the past week or so. She showered and dressed and kissed a still slumbering Castle before heading to the precinct. She'd spent way too much of yesterday afternoon preoccupied with the damn gift exchange that she didn't even want to be part of in the first place and their case needed review. She stepped from the elevator on the fourth floor and discovered Ryan and Esposito giggling about something or other. It was definitely too early for those two, she thought, dropping her shoulder bag on her desk, and she headed into the break room for some water.

"So, Beckett, I hear you're looking for the person who picked Castle for Secret Santa," Ryan asked with an audible grin, as he snuck up behind her.

He sounded like a 12-year-old on the playground. Ridiculous. This was all ridiculous.

"If you're not that person, Ryan, I suggest you stop talking right now."

It was obvious she was in no mood. "No, I'm not," he spluttered soberly and rushed away. He shrugged as he slinked back toward Esposito, and rubbed his arm after the punch he received upon his return.

The three of them went back out to canvas later that morning. Castle had things to do and wasn't certain he'd be in at all, which was fine. She needed some time anyway. She'd asked a half dozen people at the 12th already if they knew who'd picked Castle and none of them had any idea- or none of them wanted to share the information. Either way, Kate was frustrated and distracted. She and the boys sat in Gates' office and briefed her on the morning's results, which had amounted to a lot of nothing.

"So, we're running phones and financials on Matthews and-"

"Can you two please give us a moment," Gates interrupted Beckett, banishing Ryan and Esposito to the bullpen with a wave of her finger. They stepped from the room, obedient but puzzled. "Is there something wrong, Detective?" she asked sharply.

"I'm sorry?" Kate asked, uncertain what had prompted the question.

"Well, you just referred to our number one suspect, _Michaels, _three times as 'Matthews', so I have to assume there's something going on."

Kate's embarrassment flushed her cheeks and she began to feel both hot and cold at the same time. "Sir, I…"

"This wouldn't have anything to do with this Secret Santa business, would it? I heard you were inquiring earlier today as to Mr. Castle's involvement, is that right? You were trying to ascertain the identity of his holiday gifter?"

"I'm sorry, sir," she offered, without the proper words to elaborate. "Yes, I was, but…"

"I picked him, Beckett. I have Mr. Castle, if that knowledge helps you any."

Kate felt a sense of relief in that instant, a flutter of excitement. "Sir, yes, actually it does." She took a moment to prepare herself. "I wonder if you might consider swapping with me. I know this must sound ridiculous, but it would mean a lot."

Gates wasn't entirely certain what to make of the request, why Kate would want to be his Secret Santa when they were already in a relationship, but she _was_ entirely certain that it must have taken a lot for her to ask, so it must be important. "On one condition, Detective," she declared. "Please be sure that Mr. _Michaels _doesn't get away with it."

Kate managed a tiny smile at her superior's taunting. "I will, sir. And, thank you."

* * *

The loft was quiet when Kate arrived home that evening. Castle had texted earlier to let her know he'd pick up something for them for dinner, so she came straight from the precinct. Without knowing exactly how much time she'd have alone, she hurried straight to the bedroom, unbuttoning her coat and tossing it unceremoniously onto the chair in the corner. Her pulse quickened as she opened one of her drawers, the drawer where she'd hidden it days before. It sat in the box just as she'd left it, and it still shocked her to look at it. To realize. She reached for her coat pocket and pulled out the somewhat mangled red bow that she'd swiped from the 12th that afternoon. He wouldn't care. Probably wouldn't even notice as he tore into the box. With the finishing touch added, she used a pen from his desk to mark it "From: Your Secret Santa" and she brought it out to the kitchen counter. She placed it there, first angled this way and then that, where she knew he'd be sure to see it when he arrived home with their food. And then she moved back into the bedroom to wait.

It felt like hours but it was mere minutes. She wondered and thought and worried and hoped. She sat forward in the chair as he came through the door, bags in hand she could tell. His footsteps were calm and soft. The overhead light came on in the kitchen and brightened the room. Paper and plastic shuffled for a moment. Then it was quiet. She knew he'd found what she'd left. The hollow of the box top hitting the counter was unmistakable. And then he knew too, knew what she'd carried in her mind for those few days. His footsteps hastened and it sounded as though they were coming at her from all directions.

"Kate," he called out, but she didn't reply. She waited for him to find her. Waited to see the look on his face before she said anything. His form filled the doorway to the bedroom, at last. "Kate," he gasped, as he stepped toward her where she now stood, "is this…are we…a baby?" The quiver in his voice struck her heart like a bolt of lightning.

"Merry Christmas, Castle."


End file.
